By that, I’m asking if you view yourself through the lens of your old nature or your new nature?
I was not the mom that I wish I had been when my kids were little. I so badly wanted to parent well, but all I saw at the end of the day were my parental flaws. I yelled instead of patiently asking questions. I accused instead of looking at my children’s heart motives. I responded with anger instead of gentleness and love.
For years regret tormented me. I so badly wanted to go back and undo all my mistakes and re-parent with the love and understanding I have now.
The other night my daughter was joking with a friend over a disciplining moment when she was younger. Her brother chimed in too. They thought it was funny that I had broken a ruler when I spanked her. I was horrified and ashamed.
My daughter and I were talking about it later and she said, “Mom, if you really had been this bad parent you think you were when we were young, you wouldn’t be my best friend.”
I sat there stunned. I realized that I was looking from a perspective that was illegal in the kingdom of God.
Whether or not my perspective is correct and God has lovingly graced my daughter’s memories, or I’m looking at my past performance through a skewed lens, I’m still sitting in the ditch of the wrong kingdom.
Love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8).
Lies That Prevent Our Freedom
We aren’t to allow the torment of the enemy near us. He is a liar and a deceiver.
We talk so much about what Jesus has done for us that I wonder if we truly grasp the significance of it.
And we live in a culture where we sing Christian songs that reinforce wrong kingdom thinking. Songs that speak of believers as sinners and wretches.
A sinner is who we were. It’s not who we are. When we are saved (think about the meaning of that word), God places us into Jesus and clothes in Jesus’ righteousness. How then can we think that God would call us anything other than beloved and cherished?
I’m not here to criticize any song writers, but I believe we need to be careful what we speak over ourselves when we sing songs that label us (in our current state) as sinners or worse.
Perhaps we consider ourselves “sinners” because we don’t really know what it means to be a new creation in Christ. We just judge ourselves for our failures, rather than viewing ourselves as God does.
So how does God view us? And how does He want us to view ourselves?
First, He tells us not to judge (Matt. 7:1). We feel the rebuke of judgment when we judge others and ourselves. It’s a reaping and sowing principle. We judge, then we will feel that same judgment against ourselves.
We miss the fine points of what God requires, which is relationship. When we fail, we’re to bring our failure to Him. It’s similar to how small children come running to their mom or dad carrying the pieces of the broken decoration they knocked off the end table. In the same way, we’re to carry our broken pieces to God. Not sit on the floor with the glue gun trying to fix our lives back together with no input from Him.
His whole purpose in creating us was to be in deep and intimate relationship with Him. He’s not angry and He won’t treat us in the same broken way some of our parents did.
He is the God of restoration and hope, and He died to make a bridge between our brokenness and His wholeness. All we need to do is come to Him with our broken pieces.
Father God, give me insight into who I am in You. How to view myself through Your lens, and love and accept myself as You do. Help me to come to You with my flaws and brokenness. You are the only one who can remove the things that keep me from being like Jesus. Fill me with Your hope and love. In Jesus’ name, amen.